[Editorial] Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Father Figures, Feminism and My Formative Years

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Please note this article includes spoilers for Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

I’ve sat in front of my laptop countless times, wanting to write about the show that changed my life. The show that I discovered when I was just 9 years old, sitting on the top bunk of my bunk bed with a cup of tea, when my mom came into my room, turned the channel to BBC 2 and said, “You should watch this, I think you’ll like it”.

From the very first scene, of the very first episode, Buffy the Vampire Slayer was a complete revelation to me. A girl and her boyfriend break into his high school, nervously she looks around “I heard a noise” she exclaims, much to his amusement. He reassures her “There’s nobody here”. “Are you sure?” she asks, as the audience waits anxiously for him to strike. She’s not safe, we think to ourselves. The guy is bigger than her, he’s too cocky and clearly bought her here for one reason and one reason only. “I’m sure” he says. “Good” she replies sweetly. As she turns back towards hi him, her face has contorted, she has grown fangs and she uses them to sink into his throat and drain him of his blood. The opening credits begin.

‘Wow’, I thought. The girl was the baddie. The girl was the one to be feared. The petite girl with blonde hair like mine was the one in control, the one with the power.

Now, I’m not saying that Darla was any kind of role model, but this was a first for 9-year-old me.  Straight away I knew that Buffy the Vampire Slayer was different to anything else I had ever watched, and as the heavy guitar chords of Nerf Herders theme song kicked in, I knew I was going to love it.

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I was (and still kinda am) the kid who fears everything – the dark, bugs, heights, ghosts, horses, you name it, so it meant everything to me that the hero of the show was a young, blonde female. I suddenly started imagining myself as her and asking, ‘What would Buffy do?’ when I was scared. I even dressed up as her for World Book Day in primary school – complete with silver foil cross and cardboard stakes.

As the episodes went on, I related to the characters more and more, and found some of the plotlines even correlated with aspects of my own life growing up. Buffy was an only child, living alone with Joyce, her single mother. In the Season 2 episode ‘Nightmares’ it becomes apparent that one of her greatest fears is that the reason her father left them is because of her, because he doesn’t love her. I, too, grew up without a father, and have vivid memories of being upset as a child and wondering if it was my fault, and what I could have possibly done wrong that would push him to leave. Of course, by the end of the episode Buffy sees that this is not the case, and her father turns up with a big smile on his face – excited to spend time with his daughter.  The outcome for me wasn’t the same, but I did grow up and realise that my father’s shortcomings were his and his alone. 

In Season 3, the episode ‘Ted’ sees Joyce bring home a new boyfriend for the first time, he is overly friendly but there is something not quite right about him. This episode concludes with Buffy and her mother realising they’d had a lucky escape when Ted was no longer around. Safe to say, my mom and I experienced something very similar, (before she met the wonderful man I now call my dad) but we weren’t lucky enough to have the experience over and done with in the space of 45 minutes. 

Just as Buffy did, I found myself seeing Giles as my father-figure when I was a child. Don’t get me wrong, I had a wonderful grandfather, and very loving uncles that doted on me - I wasn’t completely devoid of male influence – but there was something comforting about Anthony Stewart-Head’s character. He was there every week, being the kind of man that I wished for so often for my mom and I. Self-sacrificing, loving, kind, but not completely without fault.

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Countless times I have sat here, trying to write about how much I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer, how much Buffy herself, and the powerful, compassionate, flawed characters around her shaped me in my formative years.  I don’t think I could ever truly find the words, but I was suddenly compelled to start typing on Wednesday 10th February 2021.

On this date, Charisma Carpenter the actress behind one of the shows’ most loved characters Cordelia Chase (Buffy’s Sunnydale classmate in Seasons' 1 – 3 and Angel's sidekick and love interest in the spin-off), revealed that,she had (and continues to) suffer as a direct result of mistreatment by creator Joss Whedon. .  In her twitter statement, she accuses him of being verbally abusive and insulting throughout her time on both shows, and has alluded to the fact that she was fired from Angel for being pregnant.

When the news broke, I sat back in shock, and sadness, and wondered to myself how a man who gave me my biggest female role models (outside of my own family) could be the same man who degraded the young women playing these characters?

In the hours, days and weeks that followed, other members of the cast have shown their support for Charisma, some even sharing their own experiences with Whedon. 

Buffy herself(Sarah Michelle Gellar), stated that she was proud to have her name associated with Buffy Summers, but that she did not want to forever be associated with the name Joss Whedon, and that she stands with the survivors and is proud of them for speaking out. Emma Caulfield, Eliza Dushku and Amy Acker were amongst the stars who also voiced their support.

Other members of the cast were more candid about their own personal experiences. Amber Benson, who portrayed Tara on the show, shared Charisma’s post on Twitter and expressed her belief that (Charisma) “is speaking truth and I support her 100%. There was a lot of damage done during that time and many of us are still processing it twenty plus years later.” She also called Buffy a “toxic environment”. 

Michelle Trachtenberg, the youngest member of the cast, stated that Whedon’s behaviour on set was “not appropriate behaviour” and revealed that there was a rule amongst the cast and crew, that the two of them were not allowed alone in a room together. No further details were provided, despite some ‘fans’ pushing for elaboration, but really, what more do we need to hear?

In 2013 Whedon was honoured by Equality Now, an organization founded in 1992 to advocate for the protection and promotion of the human rights of women and girls. In his acceptance speech he famously questioned why other men AREN’T writing about strong women, preached about equality and called out misogyny. He has always been regarded as a strong ally to women, and has even been known to refer to himself as a feminist whilst doling out advice to other men on what it means to be one. 

Unfortunately though, it seems the signs of this hypocritical kind of behaviour were always there, and this isn’t the first time that Whedon has been called out for the way he treats people. In 2017, his ex-wife Kai Cole wrote a whole article calling him a ‘hypocrite preaching feminist ideals’, accusing him of multiple cases of infidelity over their 16-year marriage, as well as sharing a letter from him in which he eventually admitted to over 10 years of affairs with actresses, co-workers, friends and fans.

In 2020, Justice League actor Ray Fisher came forward and accused Whedon of “Gross, abusive” behaviour on set back in 2017. He didn’t elaborate further on the accusations, but Warner Media launched an investigation, and in the following December announced that “remedial action” had been taken. In January 2021, Fisher posted a statement on social media, revealing that the company had dismissed him from the cast of the upcoming superhero film The Flash.

Joss Whedon and his ex-wife Kai Cole

Joss Whedon and his ex-wife Kai Cole

The difficulty in loving something so much, and telling the world about it, is that as well as talking about all the incredible things that the show did for me, and so many others, I must also acknowledge its faults. In Buffy itself, there were signs that Joss may not have been the feminist icon people made him out to be (or rather, he made himself out to be). Viewers have often pointed out a number of plotlines and character choices that are inherently problematic. Even the simple fact that the Slayer line itself was created by men, and that the Watchers were predominantly male and essentially in control of the Slayer. 

There’s also Xander, who I have come to realise in my older years, is abhorrent. In the early seasons, it’s clear he feels entitled to Buffy and Willow, and often throws a tantrum when he doesn’t have their full attention. In both his later relationships with Cordelia and Anya, he belittles the women, points out their flaws and eventually ends their relationships in the most painful ways possible. Whedon once stated that Xander’s character was based on what he was like as a teenager. Go figure.

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After the release of Charisma’s statement, I took to my own Twitter account to share my support. I talked about my shame at how ignorant I had been to past allegations, purposely choosing not to look too deep into them, and hoping against all hope that they were just over exaggerated or not as bad as they seemed. I selfishly didn’t want to believe that this man that I had looked up to, that had created something so meaningful to me, could be such a monster. 

I expressed how devastating the news was, because now there is categorically no denying that a show I love so much and have spent so much of my life invested in, is tainted.

I realised as I posted how self-absorbed I sounded. I am not a victim of abuse; I am not a victim of inappropriate behaviour and I have not personally suffered at the hands of Joss Whedon. I don’t have any personal relationships with the people involved – they are not my family or my friends – so why did this hit me so hard?

Well, it seems I was not alone in my hurt. Hundreds upon hundreds of women (and men) took to social media to express their feelings about the revelations. Messages of support for Charisma, Amber and Michelle, apologies that they had to go through this and felt the need to stay quiet for so long, and angry rants about how disgusted they were with Whedon and anyone else who may have turned a blind eye to his behaviour.

Anthony Steward-Head, it seems, had been a father figure to a lot of us growing up, as well as to the young cast on set. His interview with This Morning following the news was particularly heart-breaking to hear. “I’ve been up most of the night, running through my memories trying to figure out what I missed” he says, “this is not a man saying, ‘I didn’t see it so it didn’t happen,, it’s just… I am gutted’. One of my fondest memories of Buffy is that it was so empowering. Not just the words in the script, but just the family feel of the show…I’m really sad if people went through these experiences…I was sort of like a father figure…I would hope that someone would come to me and say, ‘I’m struggling, I just had a horrible conversation.’”

As well as messages of support, I was also taken aback by how many messages  completely reflected my own feelings about the news, the show and how much it meant to people. Women, in particular, talked about how Buffy was their first role model, and one of their gateways into becoming a huge horror fan (Our Editor-in-Chief Zoe Smith and I also have that in common). They were expressing how it taught them about what it means to be a woman who is complicated, flawed, confused and scared and to still get up every day and face your demons (and to still sometimes feel desperate for the love and support of a man – which does NOT make you any less of a strong woman). 

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I saw comments and received messages from people telling me that Willow’s characters and storylines helped give them the confidence to come out, and the encouragement to work through their own issues with addiction. That ‘The Body’ was the closest they had seen their own grief over the loss of a loved one reflected in any TV show or movie ever, and that that was a great comfort to them.

I could write about Buffy the Vampire Slayer all day long, and all the ways it has helped me navigate my younger life. I could give a full review of every single episode in detail and create a list of all the reasons I love every single one… maybe one day I will. But for now, I will just ask that if you are a fan of a show - any show - that has bought you the joy and the comfort that Buffy has bought to me, and so many others, please consider that the ‘creator’ is just a job title, and generally for just one person.

I have seen so many calls to cancel support for Buffy so as not to benefit Joss Whedon any further, and heard devastated fans stating they feel they can’t enjoy it in the same way now. But Whedon did not solely create the characters that we love. He did not write every single plotline and character (or song). He did not design Buffy, Willow and Cordelia’s peak-90s outfits that we love to look back on, nor did he personally design all the wonderfully inspired demons that they fight. He did not deliver the lines that we all quote as our favourites “Out. For. A. Walk. Bitch”, “If the apocalypse comes, beep me!” “Willow, gay me up. Come on, let’s gay.”

Clem – My personal favourite Buffy demon, and a brilliant example of the talents of the make-up and special effects department

Clem – My personal favourite Buffy demon, and a brilliant example of the talents of the make-up and special effects department

Over the course of the seven seasons, there were over 15 Writers, over 30 Directors and over 25 Producers on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. There were the makeup and special effects team, the editing team, the production design team, the art and sound departments, the visual effects team, the costume and wardrobe department – just to name a few. There were then, of course, over 900 cast members (and their stunt doubles). So much work, and love, was put into making Buffy the Vampire Slayer a show that even 25 years later people still want to talk, read and write about. 

To paraphrase our Queen SMG herself – I am proud to be an (almost) lifelong fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but I do not want that to be forever associated with the name Joss Whedon. In other words - Don’t let one asshole stop you from enjoying the work of over 1000 other people. Long life the Buffy fandom - “‘There is only one thing on this earth more powerful than evil, and that’s us.”

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